A misunderstanding between two lawyers
by queenofclichayy
Summary: Edgeworth plans to confess all to Phoenix, but things don't exactly go down the way he had hoped they would. T for sexual references.
1. Chapter 1

_**A misunderstanding between two lawyers**_

Edgeworth felt jolly well rampant and by that I mean horny, for less inferring readers. He wanted to have sex and dammit, he wanted to have it right now. He wasn't that fussed about who he had it with and by not fussed, I mean he wanted to do it specifically with Phoenix Wright, the sexy, spiky haired lawyer with an aptitude for law and cold medicine.

Of course, he never disclosed this information to anyone. Being a lawyer was about keeping your emotions close to your fine, bulky lawyer chest and imagine the embarrassment at people discovering that he wasn't as moody and repressed as everyone assumed he was. His father's tragic, elevator-related death had been awful, but he'd finally gotten to a place where he felt he could love again, but not a father figure, more of a boyfriend figure who he could do it with as well as love.

There was nothing strange about that mad glint he held in his eye that day as he stood in the lobby awaiting Phoenix who would arrive soon. He felt positive about his plan to confess his feelings and if things went well he figured a quicky in the bathroom wouldn't go amiss. Nothing could go wrong and his face almost curled into a slight smile, before the muscles in his mouth started to spasm and he had to sit down for a minute to recover from his bodies shocking reaction. All the same, he felt happy and not happy in a repressed way like he often felt.

His eyes flashed up as he saw Phoenix open the door; that spiky outline of his hair and elegant blue suit. Nothing was more arousing to him. Phoenix greeted him by clapping his hand down onto Edgeworth's shoulder in a boyish, friendly way. He didn't like this sudden contact; his muscles started spasm again and he had to sit down for a moment, catching his breath before he could talk properly.

"Wr-Wright, I uh, wanted to wish you luck in today's trial." Edgeworth said, finally having gotten over the shock of being touched.

Phoenix grinned back at him, "Hey, thanks. You too, Edgeworth, but even if I lose, nothing could get me down on a beautiful day like today." He was nodding like a charming Labrador, his small pink tongue lolling out slightly.

"You seem awfully happy, Wright." Edgeworth said, primly.

The blue-suited lawyer grinned and nodded in response, "I'm very happy thanks. In fact, I'm on top of the world!"

"And why is that, might one enquire?" Edgeworth said, properly, making sure he wasn't being too informal with his friend and stepping over the line.

Phoenix shrugged, but it wasn't very effective. He knew exactly why he was happy. It was as though tiny little cherubs had flown into the room and shot one of the two lawyers straight in the chest. "I met a guy." He replied, some drool sliding out of his mouth slightly, which he quickly (and attractively) licked up. "It's so great Edgeworth, I've honestly never felt this way before."

Edgeworth fell back like he'd been shot by a strapping cannon and clutched his heart protectively, reeling from the awful shock that he'd just received. How could Phoenix be with someone else; how could there be such a flaw in his plan? This wasn't supposed to happen. It felt like Phoenix Wright had just stomped all over his fragile, maroon heart with his large, black, lawyer shoes.

Luckily, Edgeworth was a total pro at keeping his emotions hidden, so even though he was dying inside he nodded primly and brushed on of his silvery hairs out of his deep, swirling grey eyes, mainly so he had something dignified to do.

"Congratulations, Wright. I do hope you and he are happy together. But do take a moment away from frolicking in a rainbow field full of gremlins and bunny's for a moment and concentrate on the case. I don't tolerate shoddy defence, though it would make my job easier, I dare say." He was both harsh and crisp with his words, his face sour, like a malnourished carton of milk.

Phoenix looked as though he'd literally just been slapped in the face, "Woah, we're not in court yet, you're acting like I'm being unprofessional or something. You asked me why I was so happy."

"I have no recollection of this incident." And with that, he walked off, a broken man, twice broken, by both a nasty incident involving his father, an elevator and a gun and now another with a blue, lawyer man who liked someone else.

**The end? **


	2. Chapter 2

_**A misunderstanding between two lawyers – Part two**_

The case went well for Edgeworth (the protagonist in this charming tale) and he beat Phoenix in court, but this was no substitute for his longing to beat Phoenix out of court too; physically that is, for making him feel so bad. Phoenix looked stricken as the cold prosecutor exited without so much as a look at his defence attorney friend.

Pretty, wasn't something you could call the truth and Edgeworth had to leave before Phoenix could see the small tears rolling down his flawlessly pale face, which quickly froze atop his cheek. Edgeworth wasn't just cold in nature and spirit, but also in body temperature. It was as though he were a vampire in a popular, young-adult vampire novel and he was icy to the touch.

"Edgeworth," Phoenix yelled, hoping to get his attention, confused by the stony prosecutor's steely reaction to the end of the case.

Egdeworth tried to roll his eyes. They were frozen in place unfortunately, but he didn't let this stop him much, "What?"

"Yo, Edgeworth, I wanted to innocently ask you why you're acting as though I've done something wrong?" Phoenix's words were eager and friendly; he'd never reminded Edgeworth more of a puppy in his life. He wanted to reach and fondly stroke behind his ear, but that might've been a bit weird, so he didn't.

Instead he shrugged, "It's nothing. I'm a busy man...and I'm sure you are. Shouldn't you be meeting your new man?" Edgeworth's words were as stiff as his signature cravat.

Phoenix looked puzzled like a hamster who'd just had it's food bowl abruptly taken from it. "What man?"

Edgeworth rolled his eyes again and looked away jolly well pissed off. "The man you have now, Wright, that's who. Now do excuse me I'm busy, I need to get home to feverishly polish my tea-set and play chess in a dark room of misery and depression.

Phoenix still look puzzled as slapped spider and raised his eyebrow. "Man?"

"You said, you'd met a guy? Good jolly locks, Wright, no wonder you lost the case if this is what your memory is like, perhaps you failed to recall some vital evidence? What-what!"

"Ha ha," was the sound Phoenix made as he laughed, "No, no, not a guy, I said I'd found some rye...you know, as in rye bread? I got a new brand down at the supermarket and it's simply amazing. I've never felt this way before about a healthy breaded snack."

Edgeworth felt foolish, much like his horse William often did when he failed a jump. How could he have misheard so? He blushed a dark reddish, pink colour, similar the the colour he sported on his suit. "Oh-oh, I see. I thought I heard differently."

"In fact," Phoenix continued, carrying on as though not perturbed by Edgeworth angry reaction to him apparently having met a guy, "I was going to ask if you wanted to come round to my house and we could...I dunno, eat rye-break together. You know, obviously, we'd put stuff on it, otherwise it's be DISGUSTINGLY BLAND like an albinos poo."

"I'd like that very much, Wright." Edgeworth replied, his happiness allowing him to ignore Phoenix's admittance to having eaten albino faeces. Edgeworth's rampant horniness would be kept at bay he rather thought. He knew that when Phoenix said eat rye-bread, it actually meant have sex. Perhaps they'd desecrate on the rye-bread and eat that, though probably not as that would be really disgusting.


End file.
